Be Careful What You Wish For….

all I wanted was to make out this weekend. I am not asking for much – just a solid make out session to make me feel good about myself.

Rewind to 48 hrs. prior…

Within the last week, I have been talking to a guy named Warren. He was what I thought was a successful find off of Match.com. We had seen each other three times (1 dinner, 2 lunches) and I thought things were going so-far-so-good! Warren is an attractive guy and had a lot of great things going for him – assuming since he is ATTRACTIVE! I decided to ask him to Happy Hour with a group of friends as a trial run. At HH, he kept up conversation and was pleasant. We finished the night by riding the metro back to are separate stops. The first stop was mine and as I was about to depart, being the southern gentleman he is – he stood up and gave me a hug goodbye. Although it was very sweet, he made me feel like a Care Bear before they would depart on an adventure to find other Care Bears…

He texted me the next day and asked me what my plans were for that night (Saturday). In the midst of Hurricane Irene, I decided that I needed to go to the bar and hear some live music. I told him which bar and he said he would meet up with me. Now – this is the true test – bringing him out to meet my two best girls, Agate and Citrine. I know these girls will tell me how it is and help me avoid the token DD move by ‘settling’. He arrived a little while after we all got there and the girls gave me the ‘He’s cute – seal of approval nod’ as we are rocking out to the band Gonzo’s Nose. The first red flag moment of the night was that he kept texting someone all throughout the night. Ugh – whatever. I can’t have it all!

As we are getting ready to leave, he asked me how I had gotten to the bar. I told him that I drove and that I only had two beers and was good to drive home. He tells me tha this car is at the metro when I said, ok – well Agate and her boyfriend are taking the metro too so you can ride back with them. He looked at me with his attractive eyes and asked me if I could drive him to his car. Alright people – yes I know this was a bad idea but he gave me the attractive puppy dog eyes look! Naturally I was thinking – yeah buddy – I am going to get my make-out on! So, Citrine and Warren got in my car and we made our way out to the storm-ridden suburbs of NoVa. I dropped Citrine off at her car and Warren made his way up to the front seat. As I am driving him to the metro, he informs me that his place is a mess or otherwise he would invite me back. Ummmm yeah, you are a guy! I expected you to be messy! I was still holding onto to the hope for a make out session since he is super grateful for driving his ass to the metro! As I pulled into the metro station, he thanked me and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek!That’s right – cheek! This was the 5th time I saw this guy and all I get is a kiss on the cheek!!!! For a moment, as my eyes were closed and slowly realizing the reality of the situation. FML.

The next day I am driving to the gym and I get a text message from my ex boyfriend; Captain Random. He asked if I would want to grab brunch with him after I finish working out. Might as well since there is a bunch spot right across from the gym. I met him at we began catching up on what is going on in each other’s lives. After we finished eating, he grabbed my hand and say, “I enjoy your company and miss you more than you know”. I know what you are thinking – Awwwww. Why am I on Match.com when there is a sweet ex boyfriend right across the table from me?!? For the record – Captain Random has major issues and that is entirely another blog in itself! So seeing that he was killing the mood out of my delightful eggs benedict, I told him I had to get going. We walked in front of the restaurant and I turned to give him a hug goodbye. As I was leaning in, he went in for the kiss and before I knew it his mouth was on mine! As I was trying to back off, his arms were wrapped around me like a skin-tight snuggie and there was no breaking free. After what seemed like hours, I managed to pull myself off of him and bid him farewell. FML.

This just goes to show you… be careful what you wish for!

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